I Guess They Threw All the Beads in New Orleans, Mardi Gras Galveston 2010

I just want Texas to be number one in something other than executions, toll roads and property taxes. – Kinky Friedman

The weather was beautiful on Saturday morning and I was up early to attend the annual Galveston County Master Gardener’s Fruit Tree sale. Having been twice before, I knew what sort of chaos to expect and got there early. This sale offers fruit tree varieties that are particularly well suited to our south Texas climate and grown with love by real master gardeners. They are sold either bare root or potted in 3-5 gallon containers. I bought a bare root Beauty Plum tree to add to my two MidPride Peach trees, and navel Orange tree (purchased at my two previous visits). Having been prepared, I was the first one to check out and headed straight home to plant my new tree.

As it got closer to Noon, we loaded up the boys and headed to the Seawall to see the first Mardi Gras parade of the day. The most noteworthy guy they had in this parade this year was none other than the former Texas Gubernatorial candidate, Kinky Friedman, chomping his trademark cigar. Sadly, (as you can see from the picture) neither Kinky nor the other folks in the parade were throwing many beads, and consequently, the parade watchers were not properly bead adorned. As one of the lucky ones to have previously ridden floats in the parade, I can confirm that you are supposed to be throwing beads as fast and furiously to the crowds as you can. The folks in this parade, apparently, had not gotten the memo about proper Mardi Gras parade etiquette.

In any case, we ended the afternoon on a high note by stopping by the locally famous, Queen’s Bar-B-Que. I had a sliced beef po-boy and my wife and son enjoyed the chipped beef po-boys. The sandwiches were good but not sufficiently large and, as usual when I go to Queen’s, I could have easily eaten two.

Mardi Gras Galveston – Maximizing Expected Value, Observations of a seasoned Mardi Gras Galveston veteran

Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose. – Tennessee Williams

As with most things, plan ahead. Check the weather forecast and make sure to bring appropriate outer wear such as a jacket or raincoat, etc. Wear comfortable footwear that can handle crowds well and that you won’t mind walking around in all day.

Eat well before you head down to the Mardi Gras. Then, eat more throughout the day to help keep you going until late night.

Bring some friends that want to party and that you will want to party all day/all night with.

Establish a meeting place in case everyone gets separated. You won’t hear or feel your cell phone in the noise and chaos of the crowd.

Buy your beads at discount mart or online - otherwise expect to pay dearly for the good ones (i.e. those that will entice a show). I recommend buying an entire package of nice ones. None of the ladies will know that you got a volume discount.

Buy your beer at a discount mart or a grocery store. Then fill your cooler and keep it in your car/truck. Park your vehicle just a block or so outside the Strand area and have a back pack or tube style pack to carry your beer into the Strand. Otherwise, be prepared to pay top dollar for your beverages.

Be prepared. If you might need some antacid, aspirin, caffeine, or other medicine to feel like partying late into the night, take some with you. Don’t be a party pooper and want to leave early because you weren’t prepared.

Regarding cameras:

a) You will not be fast enough to be able to photograph very many flashers – the whole thing just happens too fast.
b) If you try, you will miss out on seeing two pair for every one pair that you actually photograph. There are plenty of quality amateur photos on the internet. Your photos will not likely be any better than those readily available so don’t waste your time.
c) The high quality chicks won’t let you take their picture for fear of ending up on the internet. If they even see your camera, most of the best looking women won’t show while you are around. If you want to see the highest quality goods, come with plenty of nice beads and no camera.
d) Your camera will be at risk of being dropped or knocked from your hands in the chaos that is the Mardi Gras.
e) You will miss out on a lot of other Mardi Gras sights and sounds trying to get photos. Forget about it. Be in the moment – party NOW. That is what you came to the Mardi Gras for.
f) Exceptions. If you are one of the lucky few to be able to enjoy the Mardi Gras from a balcony above the crowds, then you will be able to get plenty of good photos. You just can’t do it from the ground. Also, look for women wearing masks. They understand how it all works and they came prepared to flash confident that their anonymity will remain intact. I predict women wearing masks will become the norm in the future.

That's it. Now, have fun and be safe.

Mardi Gras Galveston 2009, Part 4 - Lamb Chop City

Think where mans glory most begins and ends, and say my glory was I had such friends. – William Butler Yeats

Sunday was another beautiful day and we spent a leisurely morning recovering from the previous evening’s debauchery. Sunday is also the designated day of our local homegame, therefore, it was foreordained that we would be attending the game as a group. However, given that we would be drinking most of the day, a solid breakfast was in order so we went out and bought some barbacoa (a.k.a. Mexican bbq – which is made from the cheek of the cow). Barbacoa is a tradition on Sunday mornings and is also rich and filling – a perfect start for a day of beer drinking. At poker, Anthony and I had some modest success but not a great deal. I won a big pot early and then went card dead. I lost two big pots where I was all in with another player and lost on the river to a 2 outer and then a 3 outer, respectively. However, Lew, the novice of the group, racked up a big win after successfully picking off some bluffs and generously offered to sport for dinner. Upon leaving, we discussed our options and decided it would be a feast of lamb chops chased with more ice cold beer. So, we went out and obtained three different types of succulent lamb chops (rib chops, loin chops, and blade chops). We prepared all of them the same way with lemon, rosemary, salt, pepper, and olive oil. Then, we grilled them to perfection. They were all really tasty but the rib chops were definitely the best. What was a surprise was that the blade chops were the 2nd best, edging out the loin chops. This is good to know since the blade chops are less than half the price of the loin or rib chops. Since everyone was leaving early Monday morning, we spent the rest of the evening in the backyard drinking beer and laughing about all the fun we had during this Mardi Gras trip and discussing how we were going to top this one next year.
I can’t wait.

Mardi Gras Galveston 2009, Part 3 - The Big Parade

It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Saturday is the big day for Mardi Gras in Galveston and the peak of the local revelry. It was also the only day of the weekend that was predicted to bring inclement weather so we prepared for the worst by acquiring some disposable rain ponchos in case we got caught in the rain. We relaxed throughout the morning knowing we would be partying late into the night. In the afternoon, we met up with the gang of friends we would watch the big parade with and made contingency plans in case we got separated in the chaos that is the Mardi Gras. Upon arriving on the historic Strand, I sought out one of my favorite street festival fares, the smoked turkey leg. It is perfect since one can hold one’s beer in one hand while holding and eating the turkey leg with the other. The Strand was packed with revelers and it was good to see so many people having a good time in Galveston again. The weather cooperated and never got too bad. The parade, however, was somewhat disappointing to me. I have ridden on floats in the parade before so I know a thing or two about how to do it right. One pays handsomely for the privilege of riding a float in the big parade and one should make the most of it. The whole idea is to throw beads to the folks watching the parade on the ground. If you aren’t there to throw beads, I don’t know why one would bother paying to ride on a float at all. The folks on the floats this year were downright miserly. Those on the ground come to see the parade in the hopes of catching some premium beads and to see the young ladies trying to entice the float riders by baring some flesh. None of that can happen if the float riders aren’t generously throwing beads. Maybe I should create a brief instructional video or something to help educate potential float riders of what is expected.
Anyway, although the parade was disappointing this year, we waded into the masses to see if we could do better at providing ourselves and other revelers with a show. I’ll not go into great detail but suffice to say, we kicked Mardi Gras ass, saw lots of exposed flesh, and had a great time!

Mardi Gras Galveston 2009, Part 2 – The Feast(s)

No matter what looms ahead, if you can eat today, enjoy today, mix good cheer with friends today enjoy it and bless God for it. – Henry Ward Beecher

Friday was laid back with the main plan of the day being to feast on two of the quintessential Mardi Gras delicacies. The weather was beautiful, sunny and comfortable. The first item on the agenda was the children’s Mardi Gras parade at my oldest son’s preschool. So, we donned our beads and headed out. The kids never disappoint and we laughed about the funny things they said and did for the rest of the morning. Following that, we obtained a cooler full of beer and ice and went to find some lunch. The first of two authentic Mardi Gras entrées to be savored was gumbo so we headed to Leo’s on Broadway, of course. Following the superb gumbo, we ventured back into Houston to pick up my Bro-in-law from the airport since he wasn’t able to join us until Friday afternoon. Finally, 4:30 pm, the designated start time of the crawfish boil arrived and we went to another local legend’s place, the backyard garden paradise at Big John’s.
This formerly nondescript backyard has been completely transformed over several years of landscaping into a virtual tropical paradise complete with a massive macau parrot named Sarge and a koi fish filled pond with a functioning waterfall. There we took shots of grappa and feasted on the second absolute must have Mardi Gras entree, boiled crawfish with potatoes, corn, sausage, etc. and proceeded to party the night away in excellent company.

Mardi Gras Galveston 2009, Part 1 - Arrival

Friendship is the source of the greatest pleasures, and without friends even the most agreeable pursuits become tedious. – Saint Thomas Aquinas

I invited several friends to come down to the Mardi Gras this year. Johnny, my bro-in-law from Dallas, my poker buddy Anthony from Ohio, and an old beer drinking and camping buddy currently residing in Michigan, Canoe Lew. When I picked up Anthony and Lew from the airport on Thursday morning wearing Mardi Gras beads and sporting a cooler full of beer, they knew without a doubt that I was ready to get the party started. The weather was exceptionally favorable with clear skies, sunshine, and a temperature of approx. 63 degrees F. We left the airport with sunroof open and at Anthony’s suggestion, headed straight for a high quality gentlemen’s club for a free lunch and some entertainment. Unfortunately, the bad economy is affecting even these sorts of places and we were promptly informed that the lunch buffet was only spread on Wednesdays + Fridays and today was Thursday. So, we decided on BBQ instead. Not surprisingly, neither of these former Texas residents had eaten any good BBQ since leaving the Lone Star State. So, we headed for the well known Goode Co. BBQ joint on Kirby. Although they were pleased, I was disappointed. I have been a judge at quite a few BBQ cook offs/contests and I know the good stuff when I taste it. I ordered a combo plate with beef brisket and pork ribs. The brisket was pretty good but not great. The ribs had some sort of cinnamon or clove taste in the spice rub that did not suit my palate at all. After leaving there, we headed to one of my local buddies place at Gotham, a swanky condo he recently leased. Doug, my buddy residing at Gotham, works from home doing computer consulting and always forks over big bucks for a premium place. This was no exception. The loft itself was really cool but what makes it awesome is that one entire wall is glass with an unobstructed view of the downtown Houston skyline and the surrounding area. If I had that place, I would never get anything done because I would be too busy being distracted by the view. After knocking out the beer I brought, we proceeded to work on Doug’s supply. Before long, it was time to go meet some more friends at Taco Milagro, also on Kirby. Taco Milagro was unimpressive with respect to the food and drinks. However, they did not disappoint on the crowd they attract for an after work happy hour. We were surrounded by visually appealing women that were also apparently affluent. We partied there for a few hours before heading home for the evening.

Mardi Gras - Galveston!

Warning – no poker content. I am still recovering from the big party this weekend. I had some relatives come down to party and we sure did lots of that. Both of my brother in laws are really into Mardi Gras and we never miss going to the Strand for the Big Event. In Galveston, that happens to be Friday and Saturday night of the second weekend. I know Fat Tuesday is the “Biggie” over in New Orleans but (unlike New Orleans) since no businesses close or let their employees off for Fat Tuesday, it just isn’t the same over here in G-Town. Everyone “throws down” on Friday and/or Saturday. The Strand is packed with revelers and the party is in full swing. Usually, we are down on the street among the “hoi polloi” wading through the throngs of unwashed masses. This year, we were up on a balcony overlooking the Strand. This really helps to position one for easy negotiations with the many lovely ladies that want you to throw beads to them. Needless to say, we threw plenty of beads and saw plenty of bouncing flesh. I have been to the Mardi Gras in New Orleans and I have to admit, we do not “outdo” them or even come close. However, we do throw a really big party here in Galveston. If you are interested in checking us out, let me know. We locals know how to do it right.